Cross Purposes

You can use your context powers to figure this out, but here's the backstory anyway: The president of the College of William and Mary decided to remove the cross from their chapel so that non-Christians would feel better about coming in. Consternations were voiced.

Now you're up to speed for the following Chronicle of Philanthropy story:

College Returns Cross to Chapel Following Revoked Gift

The College of William and Mary has restored a cross to its chapel after its removal prompted a donor to revoke a $12-million pledge, report The Chronicle of Higher Education and The Virginian-Pilot.

The college had taken down the cross, which had been displayed on the altar since 1932, in October in an effort to encourage students from all faiths to feel free to worship at the chapel. The move was received by some critics as an insult to the college's Christian history and founding. The controversy culminated in an unnamed donor's decision to withdraw a $12-million pledge last week.

The 18-inch cross will now be displayed in a glass case in a "prominent, readily visible place" inside the chapel. An area that houses sacred objects will now include pieces from other faiths.

Whether the unidentified donor will reconsider, now that cross is being returned, was unclear, The Chronicle reported.

Whether removing the cross was a good idea, and whether its real motive was the same as the stated motive -- these are factors I have no information about, so I'm in no position to pronounce an irrelevant judgment here. I'm generally in favor of not alienating people of other faiths, and as long as we don't do without Christ, we can do without symbols of Christ.

But this stab at mollification is far lousier than just removing the thing. Our religious symbol was restored so it could rest in a little box near other religions' symbols. Instead of removing the symbols altogether, let's just rearrange them to make our God seem approximate with other people's gods.

Oh well, at least Mammon was appeased. Gods forbid principle would cost more than $12M.

My 5-Year Old Nephew Can Schmooze Better Than That!

The Art of Schmoozing.

Of course, he's not talking about an art here, he's talking about a set of techniques, which some might argue is explicitly NOT art. (But boy howdy am I not about to steer this vehicle down Define Art Lane.)

The good news (for me) is that I already understand and use most of these. The bad news is that Guy fails to mention that this is a lot of freaking hard work. He tosses these off like they're little tips. But underneath many of them is the unspoken assumption, "Know yourself very well. And then choose to believe the solution to your needs resides out of your immediate control." That's deep! Nine points on a Web site doesn't get you there.

If somebody's a bad schmoozer it's not as though they'll read these and be enlightened. They'll bounce off the bad schmoozer like a space shuttle with a shallow entry vector.

As always, I come away from these things wanting to write a motivational/self-help book, but really address the thing itself. People don't need clever tips on how to schmooze. They need someone to stand next to them and tell them that when they think about how they got really rejected hard when they tried to talk to someone in grade school -- and so taking that interpersonal risk has held uncomfortable associations ever since -- they need someone to hang around for a while and say, "Hey, that was a big deal, and it's clearly important to you. But it doesn't have to be every conversation ever. The next conversation can be different." <-- all hypothetical, as I have no hangups about conversations, beyond mild introversion.

But I don't know if it's even possible to write that book -- that wise, empathic friend book. I sure could use one sometimes though.

Sudden Topic Change: The surprising tip for me is #9, "Ask for the return of favors." The practice of clearing the decks is smart. I'm adding that to my extrovert bag of tricks.

If I Can Make It There

Just in time for spring, Ironic Sans has alerted me to a cool way to spend a day goofing around Manhattan. David Friedman has kindly mapped the photogenic locations of the Ghostbusters movies. Click through to the map from his permalink.

Actually finding the time to get into New York for a day though, is like an Alaskan penguin hunt. You're in the right environment, but damn if you can find any.

Music For Redecorating

Note: This post got away from me in the writing. The management apologizes for any inconvenience.

These songs are moving into my head and measuring the walls for furniture.

Jonathan Coulton. Have you heard of Jonathan Coulton? I tend to assume that any audience containing n unknown readers is n-150 degrees cooler than me (Kelvin), so I feel extra self-conscious when I dare to explain about something that OMG you so knew about since last Easter, when it was broadcast from blimps over 80 cities simultaneously, where was I? For real?

But I'm going try to explain about Jonathan Coulton anyway. See, he's um... this guy who knows some other people... who are sort of obscurely famous? The McSweeney's crowd? John Hodgman? You know him? The PC guy in the PC vs. Mac commercials, who is more enjoyable to watch than the hipster Mac guy who I have the unreasonable fear that you are?

Forget it. Just read Jonathan Coulton's Wikipedia entry. Now, cool and uncool, we're moving at the same speed. Maybe? Sure. Let's say we are.

Okay, these songs. I've been listening to them for most of a week, and I'm a little disturbed by them, right? Because they're not always gentle in content? But they sound very nice.

By now I've watched interviews with this guy, and read up on him, and he seems like a nice guy. But he writes some sad, sometimes uncomfortable* -- yet very listenable and fun -- songs. After listening for a few days, pieces of my conscious and subconscious started introducing themselves, and they're sort of hitting it off.

A nice thing is that most-to-all of his songs are free, and released under Creative Commons, so if you want to screw with them, then rock that particular microphone, friend.

Here is the web site where you can hear and purchase his music: www.jonathancoulton.com/songs

The best ones in my expert opinion are Code Monkey and Re Your Brain. Many people also seem to like Skullcrusher Mountain. I can't say as I blame them.


*In the Info section for Soft Rocked By Me, he starts by saying, "I find this one a bit unsettling."

Glass Jaws

This is so great, I almost didn't want to tell anybody -- four videos of Ira Glass giving advice to beginners and talking about what makes good stories.

Boy, did these not need to be videos though. Ira Glass sits in a chair! For several consecutive minutes! While talking! Still, way worth listening to.

Back to the Buffett

Warren Buffett is looking for a successor.

"We need someone genetically programmed," he specifies, "to avoid serious risks, including those never before encountered." Other talents he will be looking for, he says, are "independent thinking, emotional stability, and a keen understanding of both human and institutional behavior."

I am not that guy. Among other things, some people could make a good case against my emotional stability. Also -- and this is not on his short list but I assure you it is germane -- despite repeated attempts, I do not seem to apprehend financial know-how.

However, I'd like to be that guy. The guy who gets to shadow Warren Buffett and watch him and learn what he knows. Not just what he writes or says, but what he knows? Hell, I'd pay for that.

But maybe Warren would want to talk this guy, who won the lottery and didn't implode. There's hope, okay? Nobody panic. There's hope yet that we won't all throw ourselves screaming into the Sun.

Someone I Would Like to Meet

Fascinating article about a cargo ship repo man in the LA Times. Max Hardberger lives the life of an adventure story. Even his name belongs in a men's action-adventure novel.

New Orleans — IF repossessing a used Chevrolet can be tricky, consider retrieving the Aztec Express, a 700-foot cargo ship under guard in Haiti as civil unrest spread through the country.

Only a few repo men possess the guile and resourcefulness for such a job. One of them is F. Max Hardberger, of Lacombe, La. Since 1991, the 58-year-old attorney and ship captain has surreptitiously sailed away about a dozen freighters from ports around the world.