Quitting My Job Again

Sometimes I wonder if there's something horribly broken in me that keeps me from settling into a job. I'm in good company for pinballing through the first half of my adult life -- lots of interesting people go down this road. But nobody, I think, does it because it seems like a good idea. You just do it when you don't know a better way.

A friend offered me a job at a game company in San Diego last month, and for the first time as an adult, when I had an opportunity to jump off into a new, weird life, I didn't. Because I'd have to move.

I'm not in love with this town. I give Philly a 6. But it's an okay place to stop for a while. Maybe... maybe some things can catch up with me.

A Story: I was driving across country a few years ago and stopped to hike in the Grand Canyon. I didn't bring sunscreen, but at a rest point, a young married couple let me use theirs. We swapped Cliff's Notes life stories. When I said I was just driving around, doing whatever seemed like a good idea, the husband said, "You are so lucky. Man, I envy you."

I didn't have a good response. Later, on the road, I thought:

"I am lucky. But so are you. If I had a pretty young wife to go on vacation with into the Grand Canyon, and if I was talking seriously about a baby on the way... I don't think I'd envy me. I'm only here because I can't figure out where else to be. If I had a clear mission, I'd be doing that."

Five years on, I still don't know what my mission is. But lemme tellya Houston, as of next week, it won't involve Vanguard no more.