Amazing science linkdump March 2013

One thing I really like about science is how we can use it to stop human misery. We could probably even use it help poor people too!

But I'll take helping the rich as a starting place.

Gel that stops bleeding instantly
I'm confused about why there's so much ballyhoo about this being used in wars. Drones don't bleed, right?

Another option is WE COULD STOP HAVING SO MANY FUCKING WARS.

Gene therapy cures leukemia in 8 days
For once, we're not curing mice. Actual people in actual remission.

Retinal implant gives sight to blind
If you have a certain kind of blindness to start with. But seriously, a much bigger deal than Google Glass.

I'll decide when I'm done

Netflix on Xbox is broken is couple of ways, not least of which is that I have to navigate the Xbox interface to get to it.

But the one that makes me genuinely angry is when I'm watching a movie or show, and the moment and credits come on, Netflix shrinks the viewing window and pushes me to the next thing to watch. If it's a serial, there's even a timer until it starts the next one.

I'm pretty sure someone with a marketing degree decided this was a good idea, and I'm even more certain that some, perhaps many, users find this delightful. But they are wrong; it is loathsome.

I like to watch credits. And often some programme will have an Easter egg in or after the credits. I want to see those as well. What I do not want is for someone else to decide when I'm done watching.

Here is the simple fix, Mr. UI Professional: I'll let you know when I'm done because I'll press one of the 4000 buttons on my Xbox controller. Since you never bothered to give me any warning as to what will result from pressing a given button, you can change it with no further warning, I think we can assume any button can alert Netflix that I'm ready to move on. Otherwise, if I don't tell you to do anything, then it means I DON'T WANT YOU TO DO ANYTHING.

I thought this sort of nusiance-disguised-as-convenience was an isolated incident until I was finished a book on my Kindle today, and was looking forward to absorbing the appendices to reinforce what I had just learned from the main text. As soon as Appendix A appeared on my screen, a black page popped up saying, "You just finished the book! Want to rate it? Tell your friends!"

At that moment, what I wanted was button that would cause a giant extendo-arm boxing glove to punch Jeff Bezos in the face. I went from engaged and learning to "gee, how many stars should I give this book?" at Amazon's whim. As if rating and recommending had any fucking relevance in the whole fucking world to what I was reading.

I don't understand why I wage such a lonely battle for user-centric design. How does removing agency help me?

Trick question! IT DOESN'T.

Intrusive UI that purports to assist or direct my experience without consulting me or offering tools to disable it is the kind of massive bullshit that will keep me buying actual books and/or DVDs into the far future.

The fact that two of the largest, best known content middlemen are doing this inspires dim hope in me for something better.

Houston, We Have Pope

So hey, new pope everybody. Olly olly oxen free.

Some nice firsts. First Jesuit pope. First pope from Latin America. First pope to take the name "Francis".

Francis, huh? Man, remember when popes would really go all out on picking good names?

Linus. Arguably the second pope after Peter. Mentioned in the New Testament, OMG. No mention of security blanket issues.

Sixtus III. The second guy to name himself "sixtus" was already pushing it. Could he have just gone to "Seventus"? But taking it to the third power, that's ballsy.

Boniface III. More like Butterface, amirite?



Top Honors
Pope Hilarius

Here's the Wikipedia vandalization perpetrated by my old pal Dmac back in 2005:

Pope Hilarius was, of course, the funniest of all popes. From his name, Americans get the English word hilarious and its sister, hilarity. His humor was a beacon of light in the church during an otherwise dark time, converting many barbarians and heretics with his stand-up comedy. His "men do this; women do that" joke has been passed down from comedian to comedian all the way to the present day. (He was thanked in the credits of Last Comic Standing.) He is also the source of the famous joke that ends in "... when I woke up, my pillow was gone!"

Lent reflections 2013

Lent again, and I'm running at it with the usual half-hearted enthusiasm. I keep wanting religion to mean things. Sometimes it does! But other times it unrolls like a rug and then lies very still like a rug.

This year I wanted to give something up, but I didn't want to give up something that would be, like, hard.

Last year for Lent, M and I tried over the top -- all juice. It was too crazy too much too fast, skipping straight from Burger King to beet juice. We would up retreating to "no processed foods" by Easter.

This year I just didn't want so much work in my suffering. So I found a thing I do a lot, that I like a lot, but that I can stop without pangs.

I'm not eating out. This Lent, everything has to come from the grocery store and be prepared by someone I didn't pay to cook for me.

It's just the right amount of sacrifice. I hope. It requires me to think about food, reflect on my choices, but doesn't seriously deprive me. (Now that I've written that down, it sounds like the biggest softball I could find. Sacrifice without deprivation? Balls to the motherfuckin' walls, Quick!)

Still, it is having an effect. With a serendipity I'll call grace, I started tracking what I eat on an app (myfitnesspal, available for download on your fancyphone of choice). I don't do it every day, and I don't do a crack job of tracking when I do. But the crux is that it creates pauses to think about what I'm shoving in my Doritos-hole all day long and to have different thoughts besides, "More horsemeat."

I'll probably be a few pounds lighter come Easter 2013, but weight loss is a pleasant side effect. What I really want is a religious observance that doesn't lie like a rug, but flies like a carpet. I want God to show me something amazing that irrevocably cuts through fear and complacency.

It sounds like I'm asking for a lot in exchange for not much. If I was serious about this shit, I'd go get imprisoned or beaten, right? But God's economy is not tit for tat. God is always operating on a different scale than humans. We're commemorating a messiah back from the dead! That's kind of a big deal. I've got to come to the table, but I can't be expected to bet real money there, you know?

Given that state of things, I think I can ask for fireworks even if my chief contribution is a wet match. But I'm afraid I won't get them. Or I'm afraid I'll be too stupid to know how to follow up even if I do. Those are the two main outcomes of religion in my life thus far: disappointed or dumbfounded.

I keep showing up though. Trying is better than not trying.